mosquitoes | 2016-02-17
the very thought of mosquitoes makes my ankles itch and brings back fond memories of being stranded by the side of a lake and being eaten alive, thanks to the poor planning of a certain friend of mine…
when one of the little bastards bites you in an effort to use the proteins in your blood to create more of their hell-spawn, they swap a bit of their spit for the blood they are taking. that spit contains proteins that trigger a mild histamine reaction in your immune system, causing a little welt and some itching. in some people, mainly children (like poor sarajayne), the welts and itching are much more severe than they are for others — this is likely a case of skeeter syndrome, which is a real thing, despite its silly name.
but why do mosquitoes terrorize some people more than others? why do some people look like they have a case of measles while others jauntily trip around as though the world is their tacet oyster?
according to our friends who effing love science, there have been multiple different studies trying to figure this out — e.g. beer drinkers, larger people, and pregnant ladies are more attractive to mosquitoes. also, mosquitoes are attracted to CO2, which is more readily expelled by smokers and more active people. interestingly, mosquitoes like the smell of Limberger cheese which is grown using the precise bacteria found between human toes and, thus, smells like feet… yuck…
but that’s the cool part in a recent study, the bacteria produce the smell, not the humans! the mosquitoes come a-courtin’ for the stinky bacteria, not the people — somehow they know that the stink means there’s yummy, baby-makin’ blood around…
there is some science that suggests that all human odours are simply the odours produced by the 100 trillion microbes which inhabit our bodies. and, since the microbes choose to live on us (based on the certain genetic concoction we each uniquely are) and not the other way around (we don’t choose them), we are truly at the mercy of two sets of creatures that are drawn to each other. the mosquitoes can’t resist that special microbial stank on one person but are, in fact, repelled by that of someone else.
so, in the end, it’s genetics, microbes, and bad freakin’ luck that gets some people pummeled with itchy demon-welts while others live their lives in happy union with God’s tiny reminders of original sin…
so far on mosquitoes
